You're heard of GRATITUDE...now enter RESENTMENT!

I remember the feeling well, and I hated it!

After my husband told me about his 4 year affair…

After my doctor told me about my stroke…

I was ticked! I felt duped! And I hated those feelings.

After doing everything I was told to do, my life still crashed and burned around me.

I was resentful. 

Resentment didn't feel good.  

Normally, I was an evenly keeled person, if not happy and engaging. I usually dismissed those “bad” feelings and moved onto something more “positive”.

But, not during THAT time of my life.

I knew that if I wanted to lead a different/better life going forward,
I needed to relate to my emotions in a different/better way. 

So, I chose to sit with my resentment and figure out what I could learn from it. 

And, as uncomfortable as it was, it was a life saver!

RESENTMENT became my superpower. 


Here’s what I learned from getting comfy with a most uncomfy emotion:
 

  • Resentment (anger, frustration, impatience, etc.) isn’t “bad” or “negative”. 

  • Those emotions exist to illuminate something.

  • Resentment comes up when boundaries are crossed.

  • Resentment taught me where I was allowing others to cross my boundaries.

  • Resentment is a litmus test that indicates something’s off.



When resentment creeps in for me, I know I need to dig into why it’s surfacing.


Before those two crash and burn moments:

  • I had been labeling anger as toxic.

  • I ignored it in myself.

  • I demonized it in others.

  • And I didn't allow the space for it to teach me. 

  • And I stayed stuck… until everything around me crashed and burned. 



I know better now. 


Here’s what you can do, so that you don’t crash and burn.

  1. Notice your resentment (anger, frustration, impatience, irritability)  

  2. Identify what it’s pointing to

  3. Choose to take action 


So, what’s YOUR superpower? 


Is it RESENTMENT? ANGER? IRRITABILITY? IMPATIENCE?

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If you’d like help in naming it, and then doing something about it, let’s talk. 


Figuring this out, could just be the difference between your busy, exhausting life
And a busy AND fulfilling one. 


Here’s to getting comfy in the uncomfortable, 
Lisa
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P.S. I'm not dissing gratitude. I actually think a fulfilled, satisfying life can't happen without it. 

P.S.S. But, when you're searching for "why" you're not feeling grateful... resentment (or any of your other "negative" emotions) will be your path. 
 

Burnout, Healthy Mindsets, Holiday Stress, Negative Self-TalkLisa BobyakBurnout, resentmentComment